May 3, 2004

By Peter Rainer

John Cadigan first showed signs of schizophrenia in 1991 while a student at Carnegie Mellon, where he showed great aptitude as a printmaker. His condition degenerated until he moved to California to be closer to his family, where his sister Katie, a movie producer, taught him how to use a camera. People Say I’m Crazy is John’s self-portrait, starting in 1997, and it’s a bracing antidote to the usual Beautiful Mind–style Hollywoodization of mental illness. At first, John is given a battery of medications that cause him to gain 150 pounds, but by 1999, his psychiatrist had hit upon the right treatment regimen. Since then, he has been able to manage his condition, living on his own for the first time since college and creating startling, semi-abstract woodcuts in his Palo Alto studio—some of which have toured in galleries across the country.

Clearly, John’s printmaking is also a highly effective form of therapy. So is his moviemaking. The sheer will to chronicle his life must have been enormous; at times, when he is too wiped out to go on, or when his paranoia becomes too acute, he simply clicks off the camera. John interviews many of the people closest to him, including his siblings, his parents, and a gregarious friend, Anne, who is also schizophrenic and calls him her “adopted son.” They don’t gild their responses. His mother, in particular, is very open about her fears. At one point, she tells John, “I don’t know how to reach out to you.” And yet, of course, her very participation in this remarkable film is a kind of reaching out. Her son’s movie repays her trust. —

Screening on April 30 at Cinema Village, 212-529-3363